A Year In New York

A Daily Bite of the Big Apple

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Day 72: Famous in Their Own Minds

September 7th · 1 Comment

As I crossed the street into Union Square for some farmer’s market groceries, a woman’s voice called out, “I love you! I love you! I love you!”

I turned to see two teenage girls were following and looking at me dreamily. “You know, she’s single,” said the blonde one, angling her head toward the brunette, who shoved her back.

“Are you famous?” the brunette asked.

I stopped and turned to give them my full attention. They thought they’d stumbled upon that most elusive of New York tourist attractions, a celebrity. I have been on the lookout too. Kate Winslet or Natalie Portman would be my first choice, perhaps at Food Emporium as we reached for the same apple. But so far I’ve seen nobody, nada, not even a Scott Baio or Gary Coleman. As I watched these girls watching me, though, I could imagine that I was the accidental sighting that launches a million tabloids off the supermarket rack – Matt Damon in a baseball cap, walking his dog in Chelsea! Kate Hudson on Bleecker Street in an old t-shirt, picking her nose!

That…guy, in Union Square, shopping for groceries!

So many things I could say right now.

“Why, yes. You probably saw me on Grey’s Anatomy. Here. You may touch my triceps.”

“Yep. I’m just grabbing some chard and organic chicken. Got Ashton Kutcher and Christian Bale comin’ over to the penthouse tonight. Wanna come?”

“Shhhhh! Keep your voice down! Do you want everyone to know?”

“Actually,” I said regretfully, “I’ve been told I look like a celebrity, but I can’t remember who it is.” (That’s how prominent of a celebrity it was.)

“Oh,” Brunette said.

“Look!” said the blonde one, pointing across the farmer’s market. “Free samples!”

They ran off, and I stood there for a moment, a smile on my face, aglow that just for a moment I had been way cooler than the Empire State Building, adored by women who didn’t even know who I was.

Tags: Personalities · Sights & Scenes

1 response so far ↓

  • 1 Jay // Sep 9, 2008 at 12:22 pm

    Oh gods, 72 days and he now wonders if he’s a celeb. Last week’s schlub seems more fitting to me, eh?

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